When there's a time to be serious
I have tons of questions, and some days I try to find out the answers, sometimes I will research with google, at times I will gain that knowledge by chatting to some people...but not in the way you think, I rarely will chat to people in person by walking up to them, they tend to bug me. People all have a use, and some need to feel reassured by anyone. These are the people I tend to get talking to me on the bus, at the bus stop or when i'm out. I intently listen, and at times say something to reassure said person i am listening...but what makes these people open to me a stranger? Do I have an open honest face? Nah, it's because i smile and have big blue eyes...my best feature...the rest of me well...erm...not that nice.
I don't like people talking to me though, and I feel uncomfy, I don't go out of my way to get people wanting to chat, I would prefer people to find me slightly oddball. Thats another reason people open up, I am a little strange and I guess they see a little of themselves in me.
I used to crave normality, but now I would never dream of it, I like been unique in many ways, I like knowing I have lost a lot of weight through determination and hard work. Something I've never really been open about is my weight, I lost 16 stone in weight, maybe I should take this out of my blog, I don't know, I wanted it to be real as well as open...but is that too open? People judge harshly and they don't know why I was so weighty...well look at it this way, shit happens...How my body looks is a mega issue, and to find a man who will accept it like it is...well we shall see...because let's face it...people are fickle.
Berry fact 1003 When i can't cry, I put on The Green Mile and sob my heart out.
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